Upson Downs

I have been so lax in writing lately, not just here, but my book reviews as well, just as my reviews have been picked up by Amarillo Style. Not to make excuses, but it's a trueism that when you start having to write (or read, or whatever you do for pleasure) for work, it becomes harder to do. I have a stack of books to review, and the stack keeps growing. I stare at them, but make feeble excuses why I can't write today.
So now I have subjected myself to 6 episodes of Sex and the City, made myself a Cosmo and put on my favorite Christmas CD and I am now sitting down to write.
I have challenged myself to knock out three reviews tonight. But first I figured I needed to blog, just to keep everyone updated (and to get my chops back in shape).
Speaking of in shape, I now have the ultimate motivation for getting to the gym. When I interviewed for this job, Tom and I went shopping for a new outfit for my interview. I got a new pair of slacks, and so did Tom. After 6 months at a desk job, I can't wear my slacks on account of the growing bulge around my waist. Last time I went home, Tom could not put his slacks on because HE LOST TOO MUCH WEIGHT.

Bitch.

On a lighter note, my last couple of Publisher Meetings have been incredible. I met with the men who produce and distribute Colt Magazine. WOW. I got lots of goodies, and they were the NICEST guys ever.
I also met with DC Comics. Many of you know how much I adore a certain amazon with incredible accessories. I really fo adore my job, which I have to remind myself sometimes, cause it's very lonely without Tom here.

Time goes by so slowly...

I cannot decide which is worse, not being able to go to sleep, or waking up 2 hours before you need to and not going to sleep.
I woke up at 4am, and have not been able to get back to sleep at all. So I figured this is the best time to write. Hey, if Stevie can write hit songs in the dead of night...

Winter is here in the plains of Amarillo. It was in the 30's all day yesterday. I don't think I am going to be able to handle this cold weather. In Odessa, we had maybe a week of freezing temperatures in February. If it is already this cold in November, I am going to be one unhappy camper over the next few months. That is one thing about the desert southwest, mild temps all year.

Tom had a minor outpatient procedure a couple of weeks ago, and I went home to help care for him. It was not a big deal, but it was unexpected and he did need a few days to recuperate. The really bad part is that it came 2 days before we were to leave for Hawaii. We had to postpone the vacation until after the first of the year. At least we didn't have to cancel.

My first book review was published in the Amarillo Style magazine. It was a full page, all glossy and everything. It made my day.

Madonna's new cd is incredible. I really like it when she gets into dance music.

Office Drama

As I was working this morning, one of my fellow buyers passed along a book to me. Her face was puffy and red as if she had been crying.
'Read This,' she says,'It will only take 10 minutes.'
I looked at the book. It was a small red hardcover titled 'Mostly Bob,' by Tom Corwin.
I did read it, I did cry, I passed it along.

Everyone in the office read it, we all cried or teared up. This was one of the most moving love stories I have ever read. I am ready to scream unto the world about this book, but it will not be released until February. Mark you calenders and remember I said this, because it will be the sleeper hit of the Spring. Already the advanced copy has quotes from Morley Safer, Bonnie Raitt, Richard Pryor and his wife, and Joanne Woodward.

It is great to find a book like that, and be able to affect what happens to it. I want to say more, but that would ruin the incredible story for the rest of you.

Be on the lookout, you won't regret it...

Classic Dames

Which Classic Dame Are You?

I took this quiz, full of confidence that I would be Bette Davis. I am a huse fan and patterned a lot of my young gay life after her.

Imagine my surprise when I turned out to be Barbara Stanwyck. I am not upset at all, but rather intrigued. It always nice to get an outside perspective of youself, from your friends, family or even the occassional internet quiz.

Not that I am planning to get Fred MacMurray to knock of Tom...

Category Five

We've had a little bit of a casting shuffle at the office these last weeks. We lost one and gained two. In the transition, several duties and responsibilities were reassigned. I am happy to say that I made out like a bandit. I am now involved in the buying of Gay/Lesbian books for the entire chain, as well as the National and Regional Author Events coordinator. Yeah for me.

Yesterday, as Wilma tuned into a hurricane, was my first chaperone for an event. I accompanied two NYT bestselling authors to an event right by my apartment. Both authors were so gracious and fun to be around, they immediately put everyone at ease. Too at ease it seems.
The book manager and I were having a private conversation over the turnout vs. sales. The turnout was incredible. However, because of the number of people who had bought copies of the book already, or were bringing in backlist to get signed, sales were sluggish. The book manager told me she had a bet going with her boss: If she sold x number of copies, he would buy her soft drinks for a year. (I won't even tell you the number, because it was so embarrassingly small) We had a laugh and I thought that was it.

She mentioned the bet to the authors.

That was about the time Wilma was upgraded to a Category Three.

I am all for fun at work, and I am all for friendly competition, but that was just unprofessional. The authors did not take any offense, but I was mortified. At the end of the night, we tallied the sales, and Book Manager was 2 copies away from her 'goal' of free cokes. The authors BOUGHT TWO COPIES OF THEIR OWN BOOK so she could win.

Wilma skipped right past four and went to five.

I was humiliated and no amount of talking could get them to reconsider. They were gracious and didn't think anything of it.

By the time I got to the office this morning, I was furious. I had to give a report to my boss on how things went and when he heard, he went ballistic. So now I had to go back to the store and give a lecture on professional behavior, and move that store down on the list of stores to get signings.

I hate having to be the bad guy, especially when the mistake was unintentional. But if this had been another author of John Grisham popularity, it could jeopardize signings for the whole chain and make my job a living nightmare...

My Milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...

Happy coincidences will bring the coolest shit your way.


I was at my friend Brent's house Saturday night, and he played me a bit of a show he had TiVo'd a week ago, wanting to know what I thought of a specific musical number. All of the show was incredible, and what was killed me is that it aired on Bravo and I had never seen it.

It was The Dan Band: I am Woman. This is a concert by Dan Finnerty and two male backup singers. They sing nothing but songs by strong women, changing none of the pronouns. This guy is so totally straight, it works. It is very funny, as they do crazy choreography and medleys no one would ever think of.

Sunday, I went out and found the live cd.

It opens with 'Free Your Mind/I Am Woman', and you know you are in for a ride. He does not really play for laughs, which makes it funny, but also underlines the fact he is paying tribute to women.

The journey goes into an ABBA medley, a Christina/Britney/TLC medley, and on and on. You find yourself wanting to dance and sing along. He has fun up on the stage, and it translates well to the songs and performance.
Midway through the show, he begins 'Call Tyrone' which is funny, but it segues into 'No More Drama' which gets powerful and serious. If he did it on accident, it was incredible, if he did it on purpose, it was brilliant. The man has a set of pipes on him. It is what makes him more than a novelty act.

I took the cd into the office today to show Brent. By the end of the day, everyone wanted to borrow it and it was all anyone could talk about. That in itself says alot.

Check him out!

The Dan Band

Blue Writing, Part II

It's no Big secret that I am a fan of Sex and the City, or that Carrie Bradshaw is a role model of mine. I am not vain enough to think that I am like her, but the arcs of some of the stories do parallel some of my life. I am sure I am not the only one. But when you identify so closely with what is going on, it is kind of spooky and reassuring at the same time.
One nice thing is that Carrie can usually pull me out of a writing funk. I can watch an episode and it will send me right to my laptop. I just finished watching Episode 5 of the 5th season where Carrie has the launch party for her book. At the very end, she gets into her limo, and the driver is so excited about Carrie's book that it reminds Carrie that getting a book published is no small feat.
I guess I needed that to remind me of what I have accomplished in the last year. I have a book review column that is published in my hometown newspaper, and I get to travel around and meet up and coming authors, as well as people already respected in the literary field. Everyone has bad days at work, you just have to make sure you use the memory of how good the good days are to reinvigorate yourself.
I love my job, I really do. I think it's just harder because I am alone here and don't get to really share it with Tom, yet. I am so ready for him to be here, and there are days I think it is never gonna happen.
Funny, just the other day I was commenting on how I don't write when I am in a funk, but there was Carrie, ready to drag the words out of me...

Writing the blues

Most great writers and songwriters turn to writing as a source of comfort when they are sad or going through great tragedy. It's how so much of our great art has been created.
I, on the other hand, never feel the urge to write when I am down or upset.
That, my dears, is why you have not seen a post in two weeks.
I am doing well, I just have so much going on, I get stressed and don't want to do anything, least of all write.
Today, I am forcing myself to in the hopes it will bring me some comfort and distraction from everything else.
And with that sentence, I have no where else to go. Everytime I hit a period, I stop and stare at the screen, not knowing what to write next.
I guess I could talk a bit about the Rita, since I am in Texas. Houston is so far away, I might as well be in another state. Not that it doesn't affect me, it does. I just don't see the immediate effects like people in South Texas are right now.
That was quick. Now I am stumped again.
We'll try again later.
(Obviously, the won't be on one of those retrospective clip episodes)

Things that happen to you in Portland

I must tell you about the author dinner. It was great fun. It was like speed dating for the literary set. Each author would stop by your table for 20 minutes, then a bell would ring and you would get another author. Some of the authors were not that impressive, but we did meet HW Brands, author of Lone Star Nation, and the very handsome and affable Michael Collins. He's Irish, and has the sexiest voice. Got my picture with him and got his email, under the guise of getting him booked for a tour (which of course I would love to do, so I could be his chaperone).
Cody and I went for drinks after the dinner, and found this really cool place, that was comfortable for both of us. Club Aura had a velvet rope and a guy with a clipboard, so I knew this was a place I would love, it also had very pretty women, so Cody was happy also. Very modern and chic. They also make great cosmos. I was soo pretentious, but I was an out of towner, so it's allowed.

I have begun to notice a few things about the Northwest. Once you are here a few days, rules and observations make themselves known:
1. You listen exclusively to Alternative music, and you like it. Portland has a great alternative station we listen to in the car. I have not listened to Stevie or a cast album since I got here. (although I did buy two vinyl Nicks' albums at a record store)
2. You begin to realize how detrimental Metrosexuality is. Everyone in Portland looks gay. If you cruise a guy, his girlfriend is likely to throw daggers your way. Lesbians are another story. Although short hair seems to be the norm, they are way prettier than the cowgirls we have in Texas.
3. They are very fond of the one way street and the buses only, no turns of any kind on any major road. It makes navigation tough. I let Cody do most of the driving for this reason.

The greatest thing happened at the end of the day yesterday. The Lion King opened Friday for a two month engagement. Last night I decided to try and go. I didn't have my heart set on it, so if I couldn't get a good ticket, I would just go to dinner. I drove down to the venue with 15 minutes to spare and ended up dead center 4th row.
It was incredible. I know many theatre snobs tend to dis the presence of Disney on the Great White Way, but the staging was so imaginative. I cried like a little girl during Circle of Life.

This is it from Portland, I have a plane to catch. See you again from the Lone Star State!

Are you hip enough?

Well, we are in the middle of the day here, and I thought I would catch you up on my morning. The show went well. We made contact with many publishers. Most of them were eager to get our business. Everyone was giving away lots of books. I kept filling bag after bag, until it hit me that I would have to get them home somehow. I decided to ship them to myself or buy another suitcase, and kept grabbing the freebies. As we walked the floor, I kept noticing this very handsome, shaggy haired boy, who looked so out of place amongst us bibliophiles. About an hour later, Cody looked at me and asked if I wanted his book, I looked around, and there was Mr. Shaggy, signing books at the author table. Not wanting to run into the cellophane syndrome again, I sent Cody to talk to a publisher while I stood in line.
With his window cleaner blue eyes, he asked a few innocuous questions as he signed my book. I shrewdly gave his publicist my card and explained that I could get him booked on a tour through our Northwest stores. He smiled and I walked away.
Back to grabbing freebies, I met a publisher specializing in books on classic cinema and gay issues. I swear he was Bruce Vilanch's brother. I talked to him a bit and he offered just one of his multiple titles to me, until the conversation got around to the fact that I bought for 152 stores. I now have his entire library of titles. He also asked me to dinner. These are the guys I attract.
Breaking for lunch, Cody and I went to Doug Fir's. If you are ever in the Portland area, go. It is incredibly hip and oh so gay. The style is very retro and the waiters are fabulous.
I have a few hours to rest before the author dinner tonight. More to come...

Mr. Cellophane

Greetings one and all. I write to you today from Portland, OR, where TMSS is on location for the Pacific Northwest Bookseller Association trade show!
I am joined this weekend by my fellow Book Buyer Cody. Cody is a great guy who has been helping me chart the waters of Regional Books. It does help that he is nice looking in addition to his natural ability to put people at ease. He has been married for 2 or 3 years, I think.
Unfortunately, we discovered a downside to traveling together. On the flight from Amarillo to Las Vegas, we had two (That's TWO) pretty hispanic gay flight attendants. They were so busy cruising Cody, I couldn't get the time of day. So, poor Cody gets tagged for a 'mo and I get ignored. It could be a long weekend.
After getting to Portland, we drove around and found our convention center, which was a minor miracle considering the map that was provided to us.
Today is an incredibly busy day for us. We have to hit every University Press we can, and there are many. Cody will be leaving tomorrow morning, so we have to get all the work done today, but that should leave me Saturday to explore the city.
More from Portland later...

Banned Books

Having been in the book business for longer than I care to admit, I am very passionate about bringing awareness to the plight of the banned book. The last week in September, the American Library Association and the American Bookseller Association both participate in Banned Books Week. Libraries and bookstores are encouraged to set up displays, hold lectures and generally inform the reading public of the threat of censorship. This has become even more important in the wake of the PATRIOT act, as the government can now search library and bookstore records without informing potential suspects and librarians and booksellers are forbidden to divulge that they have been searched.
When I was in the bookstore, I faithfully set up a display every year, and also participated in a discussion group at the county library. The display was a hit. Many books would sell off of it, and it always garnered media attention. When I got to home office, I decided to see if we couldn't go chainwide with the display. We have, and have received nothing but good feedback from the field.
What surprises me is that when I talk to the average person, they have no idea that a) Books are still being banned and b) There is a week dedicated to it. This is frightening when the ALA releases a report that more books have been challenged or banned this year than last year. MORE, not less. In this era of panic and fright, literature, the cornerstone of knowledge and communication, is being removed from schools and libraries across the nation...

Lost innocence

I got home today to a lot of laundry sitting on the sofa, dishes in the sink, and general unruliness in my apartment. Not having any pressing engagements, I put on Madonna's Drowned World DVD and began to clean.
The background music was very helpful and I got a lot accomplised in a very short time. When I sat down, I remembered the last time I had seen it.
HBO had aired it in it's entirity live. I had decided to make an evening out of it. I called up Keith and David, and Karen and Nicole. We made appitizers and sat around reveling in the majesty and genius of Madonna. I was disappointed that her Evita number was reduced to an instrumental of 'Argentina,' but it was an incredible night: Good Food, Good Friends, Good Entertainment.

It was the last week of August 2001. It seems like a different world, and it was. There were no color coded alerts, no taking your shoes off at the airports, Karen and Nicole were together and there was no sign of the cancer that would claim Nicole.

I am not usually one for such morose thoughts, but as I watch the devestation Katrina has wrought and the general lawlessness that has pervaded the aftermath, I yearn for those simpler days.
Of course those days weren't simple, they just seem that way, clouded by the distance only the past can provide...

The Greatest Star of All

I am a firm believer in serendipity.

A few weeks ago, it was announced that Glenn Close and Ewan MacGregor will star in the movie version of the musical of the movie Sunset Blvd.

A few days ago, I read a blog about the classic movie.

And tonight it is on tv. I think the spirit of Gloria Swanson is trying to tell me something...

I was a big fan of the movie, the first time I saw it, at the tender age of 18. Thanks to my dear friends Ron and Jim, who introduced me to the required cinema of the cultured gay. Soon after, I was pleased to hear about the musical being produced with my dear Patti LuPone in the title role. I haunted my record store for the cast recording, and memorized every word. It was wonderful.
Then the drama of the Normas. Patti was out, replaced by Glenn Close-But-No-Cigar. I was beside myself as only a show-mo could be. I did get the Close cast recording just in case I was being judgmental, however, her Carol Burnett dialogue delivery and less than stellar vocals reaffirmed my decision not to see it until she left the show.
Enter Betty Buckley. I loved her Norma. Plus, I was 4 rows from the stage, it was a magical.

Watching the movie again, I realized no one could do Norma justice. Gloria Swanson makes Norma larger than life, in ways that no other actress could. Sure you sing along to Patti or Betty, but Gloria owns that role, you firmly believe she is Norma. From her eyes, to the tiniest of hand gestures, she is The Greatest Star Of All...

A Slice Of Urban Life in a Non Urban World

I love big cites. I love the hustle and bustle, the unending possibilities, the adventure. Everytime I have every taken a trip to San Francisco, Dallas, Houston, Los Angeles, or New York, I feel so at home.
But I don't live in a big city, although Amarillo is a step up. So I find little urban things to do in my decidedly non-urban environment.
Like sitting at a Starbucks on a Saturday morning, drinking my vanilla latte, eating my coffee cake and blogging while I people watch.
It's really the people watching that brings me back to rural Texas. No one in a large urban environment would be wearing matching capri pants and flip flops in lime green with a head of hair so tall it makes Elsa Lanchester look like Pipi Longstocking. (Unless you are in New Jersey) Everytime I see the occassional metrosexual (I have issues with them, but that's another post), he is in the company of the hideously uneducated and unrefined girlfriend/wife and kids.
I do get the occasional celebrity sighting, not related to my job. Anyone who has followed the VH1 show 'Strip Search' knows about the guy from Pampa, TX. Pampa is only 30-45 minutes from here. I saw him in a grocery store the other day.
(hmmmmm....Starbucks does wonders for my blogger's block)

Restarting a blog...

...is tough, after you've been out of commission for a while, especially when you find yourself writing all the time in your job. I can still crank out the book reviews, but when I sit in front of my notebook, I have no idea what to write. As some others have commented, there really is blogger's block, and I think I am suffering from it right now. Not something the everage reader wants to read, but I feel that I must write something, just to get back in the habit.
All is well on the set of TMSC right now. I have been busy buying books and hasseling publishers for free copies of stuff.
I actually have two books worth mentioning:

1. 'The Stewardess if Flying the Plane' will be available in late September, early October. This lavish coffee table book chronicles the cinema of the 70's with lots of photographs and interviews from film notables of the era. I asked for a copy just cause I liked the title and the cover (Karen Black on the radio, like you didn't already know)

And then there's...

2. Tequila...A photographic essay on the time honored tradtion of making the liquor in the town it is named after. Did you know that manly Mexicans strip naked to get in the vats and stomp around? Beautiful pictures...

Travelin' Man

Wow. Now I have Internet at my apt, so I don't have to hang out in Starbucks all night. Although, it was quite fun, sitting with my mocha frap, listening to Yahoo Launch Radio with all the other laptop posers.
I know I am going to regret this, but I filled out a form to make my laptop work compatible, so I can work from home if I need to. I know I will get taken advantage of, but I like the idea of working with the tv right here, and in my bathrobe. It's also very bad to be in the office 12 hours a day. So there. I will also be able to take it to trade shows with me. I am so excited, I'll be in Portland and Denver next month.

Season Two

Hello all! TMSS, is back from hiatus!!!
I have been surprised at the emails here and there from loyal readers wondering where I went. Of course, a lot of my time has been taken up with the new job, and the maintaining of a long distance relationship. I know some of you out there know what that is like. But mostly, I have been without internet access except at work. It does create a problem when your forum is web based.
However, fate has smiled upon me yet again and I am sitting here in Starbucks, posting via my new laptop. I feel very Carrie Bradshaw, except there is a table next to me doing a bible study in the most hideous getup this side of a rummage sale. The costume designer for Sex and the City would never permit that. I guess my supporting cast isn't as important. Hopefully, my budget for this season will increase and I can get better ambiant characters.
I am very upset that I am not 'The Gay One' at work. There are 2 other 'mo's in the department, both of whom do drag. Not that there is anything wrong with it. It's just that I was very used to being the 'Gay Guy' at work, without it bothering me. It was my schtick. Now I have to revamp my place in the office heiarchy. On the bright side, I am always Mr. Positive Attitude, so I try to keep everyone's spirits up and have now been dubbed 'The Morale Fairy.'
In the reading dept, I have come across some incredible literature. When it hits the shelves in September, I reccommend John Berendt's new novel, 'City of Fallen Angels.' It's a pretty good follow up to 'Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil' considering it has been 10 years.
See you next episode!

Nicole

A little background:

A few years ago, Tom and I were very active in a small community theatre in Odessa: The Center Stage. It was run by a friend of ours. Center Stage put on all kinds of really fun productions. The best part, of course, was all of the cast parties. We had this little gang that spent so much time together. Sue, Jim, Amy, Brad, Jack, Mack, Ray, we were always involved in one production or another. It was one of the highlights of my life.
At one party, we met a young woman named Nicole. She was funny, and so quick! I would match her wit against anyone.
As is always the way of the world, Center Stage closed down and people started drifting away. Nicole only lived 20 miles away, but it seemed our schedules would almost never mesh. When we did get together, it was like no time at all had passed. She was an avid reader and we would swap books to read anly to discuss them in incredible detail later. Nic was one of the first people I introduced to 'Wicked.' She encouraged me to set up a book review club, and even brought a friend along to the two meetings we had.
I would often think of Nicole, but we did not see enough of each other.
Nicole lost her battle with cancer on July 4th. Independence Day.
I could think of no better tribute to her life than to make sure others knew her name, and how special she was, to have touched my life in so short a time...

Forget Steve McQueen

My new matinee idol crush is Tab Hunter, circa 1950.

I was sent an ARC of his autobiography and it is great. Tab discusses his life with great candor. No stone is left unturned as he recounts his beginnings as the son of a single mother who becomes one of America's favorite leading men.
He delves into his sexuality without giving it a smarmy feeling. We know who and sometimes where, but not the how's.
The most interesting part of the book is the background on Hollywood. He spends a lot of time on the set, reminiscing about the movies he made and the people involved. From Sophia Loren to his stunt double Jack Conner, it's all there.
Plus, there are dozens of pictures throughout, mostly of Tab with a swimsuit on.



In other news,

Before I left on the long holiday weekend, I was asked by our ad department to do a voice over for a TV commercial. It was a 30 second spot, and they had 25 seconds of copy with 4 alternate tag lines at the end. I was wisked to a recording studio and spent the next hour giving every reading imaginable to 20 seconds of video rental information. It was actually quite fun, especially when I pulled out my star attitude with: I am rewriting this line so it will flow better...